MEDITATIONS ON MUSIC & MEDIA

WELCOME TO THE WALL OF TUNES!

Welcome to the Wall of Tunes Header

Part I

Once upon a time (a few days ago), while still firmly devoted to the idea of developing a blog that covered just music, I set out to find a title that related in a very specific, personal manner to this subject that occupies the largest, most favored territory in my pop-culture nerdom. The Wall of Tunes was always my first choice.

YES THE MAYOR’s GONNA HELP BUILD THE WALL

Several years ago, my wife (the Mayor), ever the nurturer, graciously honored my desire to rescue our music collection from certain doom in a cold, damp Michigan dungeon. Thus, by reallocating wall space in the home “office” to this end, The Wall of Tunes was born. To this day, I wonder if she fully understood what she was getting into.

At first, the Wall was confined to roughly 3/4 of a shallow-depth 4′ x 7′ shelf we rescued from the garage. However, it’s since spread completely out-of-control like a…super-cool…virus (?). Today, much to my own amazement, it covers 3/4 of the entire 10′ x 8′ wall area and then some.

Our first amendment was the right-side addition of a 4′ wide shelf – half of which accommodates my old component stereo system and our modest combined record and cassette collections. This segment of the collection, by-and-large, remains stable. For better and for worse, the inflated value of vinyl right now has all but eliminated opportunities for inexpensive additions. Nosireemaam, the main offender is cds.

Ever since the digital revolution tanked demand for hard-copy media, cds just get cheaper and cheaper to attain; making holes in the collection easier than ever to fill. The main shelf is stuffed almost beyond carrying capacity. I had to make auxiliary space across the room solely for discs with paper/cardboard sleeves.* I can’t (won’t) help myself. It’s like…helping the collection to fully live up to its name has become my life’s driving ambition. It’s our own little library of congress…

* Vertical stacking was damaging the delicate packaging – and that will not do.

Origins OF A NAME

Our daughter (the Kid) was still a wee little person when the collection took up permanent residence in the room next to hers. Even at such a young age, she recognizing the significance of this monumental happening! Moved by the power of maximum musical awesomeness, she crafted a sign that officially christened the cd shelf “The Wall of Tunes.” It was perfect!

ORIGINS OF A BLOG

Of all the passions I’ve indulged in my lifetime, none have been more enduring than my love of music and fascination with those who make it. To be clear – I’m not a proper musician. Absent formal training, I can offer few sophisticated insights into music theory. Regardless, whatever my shortcomings, I’m compelled to listen intentionally, analyze what I’m hearing, and discuss with others who share my passion, if not always my conclusions. Twenty years ago, I even considered committing my thoughts to writing but, ultimately, shelved the idea.

Fast forward to about three years ago. Consistent positive feedback on my Facebook musings re-ignighted the idea of creating a dedicated forum for my writings on music. Of course, once I began researching the availability of “Wall of Tunes,” sure enough, found that belonged to an obscure record label based in India. INDIA!!!  They have a Facebook page and everything (many LOUD NOISES)! Awesome. Now what? 

Desperate for fresh inspiration, I consulted with the court of public opinion (FB friends) and contemplated alternative titles. At one point, the term “forte” – used in musical notation to indicate “loud or strong” – struck a chord (pardon the pun) because, well, I tend to like things loud. However, harboring no illusions that mere ownership of a drum set played with all the skill and refinement of an angry baboon* makes me a proper musician, this choice seemed false.

No, something more befitting a devoted fanboy/collector was in order.

* Seriously, though… My playing isn’t that bad. It’s just that I’m not studied enough to be worthy of such a refined, academic term.

FURTHER BRAINSTORMING

Hmmmmmmmmm… What about something completely random like “Ostrich Genitals” or “Underwater Necromancy?” No…? Ok.

What if I copped my name from a favorite song title? The Flaming Lips always had some great ones (“Psychiatric Explorations of the Fetus with Needles”). Meh. Too long and weird for the normals. Plus, the novelty would only qualify as “original” to folks who aren’t familiar with the songs. Hmmmmm…

How about something straightforward and literal, such as “Vinyl, Plastics & Magnetic Tape?” That sounds ok, but the redundancy kills it for me (vinyl IS a plastic).

I floated plays on my given name, as well, but that wouldn’t do. I’m (supposed to be) smart. Surely, I could find a more imaginative way to brand my work than resorting to transparent narcissism… Oh! I could have called it “Get Off My Lawn…” Most of the stuff I write about is considered “gramps” music now, anyway. “Spleen?” Yeeessh! Sounds like the name of a 90’s grunge clone band. Negative.

Ahhh, well. SOMETHING else would have come, but my creative process is like that of Dr. House: a lot of wheels spin before satisfactory solutions pop loose. No thank you (blowing a raspberry).

It’s settled then. My first choice it is.

I like “THE WALL OF TUNES.” It’s personal, it’s right and it’s MINE, precious.

Greetings and salutations! Welcome to THE WALL OF TUNES!

Join me next time on The Wall of Tunes for…
WELCOME PART II: FACEBOOK vs. THE GROOVEWONDEROUS WALL OF TUNES

4 Comments

  1. Christina W

    I LOVE this my brother!!! Especially now, when we don’t dare get together because we can’t be sure what the ‘STUPIDS’ might have dumped all over us despite precautions that those of us with actual, functional gray matter can take. I MISS you guys terribly, particularly right now. I look forward to seeing what you do, and share with this new adventure. Love You!!

  2. Michael Schultz

    I thought of a band name out of the blue a while back. Glad I keep a Google Doc on my phone for outright random inklings.

    Thoroughly Christened

    They have a kazoo that comes out of a you know what else it could be and two basses, among other things, and they market to lonely disaffected Nine Inch Nails fans who live with their mum and dad and bake them cookies.

    • fgboughner

      The good news is that if you were so inclined to keep this band name for yourself, it doesn’t look like anyone had laid claim to it yet. I looked it up and found nothing but legit links to baptisms and such. Instead of going the rote route of the 3rd rate Ministry/NIN clones, why not do something iconic… Build an image based on Mennonites, use nothing but folk instruments and sing to really, really old-timey hymn structures…but with lyrics in-line with something akin to what Al Jourgensen would do… It’s a thought…
      Thanks for reading and commenting Michael!

  3. BirchTree

    Love the color choices you made for the catchy title box. The introduction is so “You” and your gift of how you can come up with random off the wall topics and titles. But “Wall of Tunes” is the best fit for this as it relates to history and a special idea from the Kid.

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